The first thursday of every month they rotate the exhibitions in the galleries in Chelsea. To celebrate and get everyone ou tto the galleries, they give out free wine and beer. This is amazing. Last night at about 5 oclock i poured my self a very stiff sunny D and vodka (gotta love moms, buying you sunny d and shit!). At about 5:30 it is gone and me and my friend paul begin to walk to chelsea. 6 oclock and we are there. i have to pee so fucking bad so i rush into a corner and go. Paul remarks, "remind me not to shake your hand". I remark "more drinks". We walk into a gallery with a bunch of rich looking assholes. Were wearing jeans and tshirts, theyre all wearing suits. This will be fun. We walk into the drink room and grab some white wine. Wine? Oh no. You see, me and wine love each other and yet we fight. I like to drink it all and it likes to get me so trashed that i cant function.
There is a ping pong table made from shiny metal, me and paul agree that'd be an awesome Beirut table. We finish a glass or two and decide to find another gallery, we walk next door where there are a bunch of shityy abstract paintings on the wall, suddenly music starts playing and a bunch of 16 year olds start doing wierd african dance. I grab a drink. The man asks me if i am of age, i smile drunkenly and say yeah. he doesnt believe me but he gives me and paul a drink. This gallery blows and alcohol is helping. I decide we need to go across the street.
Across the street we walk up a few flights of stairs and we reach a whole new areana of galleries. Small galleries, all right next to each other. AWESOME. We walk into the first one, we realize there are NO DRINKS so we quickly leave. The next one as soon as we walk in a lady says, Hello there are drinks in the back. I can tell were going ot be friends. I walk to the back grab MORE WINE and look at the paintings. they are marble dust and acrylic with photography interwoven in. Its interesting, but it may just be because i am drunk. Im already about 8 drinks in and its not even been an hour. This night HAS to end badly.
We wander into a new gallery that is packed with people and everyone has yuengling bottles in there hands. SWEET. i hunt down the cooler and crack on open. This is amazing. no more shitty wine. The photos in that gallery are all really small and precious i think they were all dont on a 4x5 field camera with a Polaroid back. Anyways. We drink 2 of those and wander back into the hall. This is when a door opens and reveals loud techno, movie screens, bud light, and a church confessional. Im all over that. i walk in, chug the rest of my beer and promptly go grab another. Im denigrated to pointing and saying please to get my beer. There are two video screens, each playing a video of a girl with a horse head dancing and stripping while a guy talks over it. It sounds like he is talking about raping her. Its really interesting. I ask the guy in front if i can go into the confessional. He says yes. I am excited. i hop in and after a few seconds someone else hops in the other side.
I ask her what her sins are, she says what are yours? i say , No i am the priest. She cant circumvent my logic. She never really tells me her sins, but we instead talk about religion and its bearing on free will and personal happiness and existentialism. after abotu 5 minutes, more people have been trying to get in, so she tells me to come to her side so someone else can get in. So i do. i stand in her booth and we talk for a few more minutes before i realize that i need more beer. I say "i need more beer". I think she takes offense to this, because she disappears. Whatever, fuck her then. I came out for beer really.
Anyways, i go back into the confessional and talk to a few more people, one couple actually hooks up in the booth, and im fairly certain i saw him get a bj. I feel dirty. One girl tells me im going to hell for saying i hate jesus. I laugh in her face very loudly and then leave. I grab paul and we start the trek back to my dorms. i get to the street and realize, i cant see straight, DAMN YOU WIIIIIIINE!!!!! about 3 blocks from the galleries, im falling down drunk, literally. i fell down between 2 cars and broke my glasses again (they were already broken but the glue broke). i fell down a few more times and paul had to "no homo" carry me down the street. we get to blender theater and i grab negatives from Cute Girl ( i have a midterm due at 3 oclock the next day...i havent started, but i figured id do it drunk) she hands me the box and leaves. She isnt amused by my drunken stupor. Some other girl is though. Some girl starts hitting on me and paul. Paul is begging for a kiss and im saying dude no. dont do it. Even through my drunken wine/beer goggles i can tell she is a chubby. He remarks about how he'll need a chubby chaser. after getting the Chubbies number, we walk to the dorm and i put him in my room and then walk down to the photo building.
Luckily i dont fall on my way to the photo building. I get there and grab my stuff, and get into the darkroom. I lay down under the enlarger and fall asleep. I am awoken a few minutes later to my friend jenny waking me up.i stand and try to enlarge a photo. this is fucking difficult. i realize i have no photo paper, i grab all my shit and leave. i tell jenny to make sure all my shit is clean, and then i walk back to the dorms and pass out.
Drinks: 12 or 13
drunk level: 9.5 no puking but im pretty cocked.
time span: 3 hours.
10 years ago